All My Wild Mothers: Motherhood, loss and an apothecary garden

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So many people can relate I'm sure, to the struggles and heartache we're faced with over the years. Victoria writes, 'when I imagined our future, it held no grief', and I know that feeling well. When you settle down into adult life, you have a vision of what your life will be, and it doesn't involve suffering. But finding joy in the little things, like creating a garden full of small wonders, is a magic unto itself.

Children can teach and remind us of so much that is simple and good in life, sadly conditioned out of us by the effect of a societal system that squashes it before it can have a chance to flourish.I share quite a few things with the author: we have had a child at the same age(albeit it was my second, but due to a huge 14 year gap it does feel as if it's my first :D), I have shared the same worry for the wellbeing of my unborn child, but also the worry of having to deal with a potentially life long condition clouding our lives; I have home educated my first born and we very much considering doing the same for our second one; I am a bit of an amateurish gardener, having had a raised bed for some year now!. Sharing all this with Victoria made me really feel her heartbreak, to the point where I started imagining how it would be to suddenly lose my sister. I have had to rein in tears as I was reading, countless times! And saying that All My Wild Mothers is a raw and tearjerker read is an understatement! Each chapter is named for a wild plant, or medicinal weed, its stories and healing properties, and then what follows is a recollection from Bennett's life, either in the present where she, her husband and son are trying to make a wild apothecary garden in the yard of their council estate house and having to manage her son's diabetes, the prejudice and bureaucracy one has to endure when one is dependent on the welfare system, and her elderly mother's recent terminal diagnosis; or at various points in the past where Bennett reflects on loves, losses and times of change and growth that were the seeds of the life she is now living. "In the broken ground of grief, I just wanted to see what could grow," she says in her author's note.

She and her son set about transforming the rubble around them into a wild apothecary garden. Daisy, for resilience. Dandelion, for strength against adversity. Red campion, to ward off loneliness. Sow thistle, to lift melancholy. Borage, to bring hope in dark and difficult times. So glad to have been part of bringing this story to a wider audience. It is extraordinary work..." (Ronnie Goodyer, Indigo Dreams Publishing Ltd) Victoria Bennett is a disabled and chronically-ill poet, author. Her writing spans poetry, memoir, non-fiction and games-based storytelling, and she has She written and talked extensively on grief, care, and writing through times of change.All My Wild Mothers is so good! Really distinctive, interesting writing...I've never read anything quite like it..." (Amy Liptrot, Northern Debut Award). Lyrical and beautiful and feels like a haven in a cynical world - exactly the book we all need to read right now' Catherine Simpson, author of One Body: A Retrospective, When I Had A Little Sister and Truestory A stunning meditation on the joy of nurturing (and of getting your hands dirty). It is a love letter to mothering and nature and mother nature, which bursts with wisdom, humility and hope. The writing is lyrical and beautiful… exactly the book we all need to read right now… What a wonderful book’ Catherine Simpson, author of When I Had A Little Sister

Five years later, and that life feels very different to the future Victoria had imagined. Struggling with complex grief, the demands of being a parent-carer for her young chronically ill son, and the impact of deeper austerity, everything feels broken. Stone by stone, seed by seed, All My Wild Mothers is the story of how sometimes life grows, not in spite of what is broken, but because of it. There are some books that you read, knowing that they will stay with you for a long time. Victoria Bennett’s memoir is one of those books ... All My Wild Mothers is one of the most achingly precious books that I have encountered in recent times’ On Magazine At the time of this initial event, she is pregnant with her first child, as the story continues her son becomes as much a part of the narrative as the author herself.

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It is also a reflection on motherhood, of one woman's experience, given her own inclinations, personality and the effect of being the youngest in a family of six children. The book begins at a moment in her life when there is an unexpected death in the family, so grief and coping with it, learning how to manage its lingering presence, plays a significant role in what follows. Andrew Waterhouse Award - Winner - for ‘an exceptional new or emerging poet whose work reflects a strong sense of place or the natural environment’ Plant the seed. Find the small thing worth the gift of your hope. Whatever else comes, trust that it will grow, even if you do not see it flower."

Publishing “Wounded Angels” (bestselling Franciscan author and poet, Fr. Murray Bodo) and “Orange Dust” (Foreword by The Dalai Lama) - Kenneth Wilson I cannot recommend this book more highly to everyone but particularly to gardeners, mothers, poets, nature lovers and to those seeking a gentler yet wilder path. All My Wild Mothers is a profound exploration of grief, identity, and rediscovery; a testament that life and love persists, even when we think all is lost. In this one act, he has learnt that society has one rule for those who have wealth, and another those who do not."

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Sometimes, we try so hard to cut out the things that do not fit the idealised garden of this life – the loneliness, the loss, the struggle of it all – that we forget to see the beauty that it holds. And it is so beautiful. So, plant the seed. Find the small thing worth the gift of your hope. Whatever else comes, trust that it will grow, even if you do not see it flower.”