Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex: Because Good Guys Make the Best Lovers

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The Great Sex Rescue will open your eyes to the harmful teachings from many of these books. If you aren't married, are going to be married, or are married, make sure that you read this book. Sex was made by God to be mutually pleasing to both males and females. This book breaks the myth that men must have sex or they will turn to porn and be unfaithful as so many other books teach. “Evangelical culture has used frequency as the measure of marital and sexual satisfaction even though research has found that frequency is not an accurate predictor at all - even for men.” In a way, I am incredibly sad for what I read in the past and tried to follow. It didn't work out for me at all. It did nothing but frustrate me, make me feel like a bad wife, and then angry at myself for feeling used when I pushed through with sex when I didn't want to (so as not to be a disrespectful wife). Thankfully, my husband is the kindest, sweetest man on earth and he's assured me in the past that he wants me to enjoy our time together. That he doesn't want to cause me pain and that he's more than happy to stop if my trauma memories come flooding in randomly (he never read any of the popular books on the subject, which I think helped a lot). I am sad for the fact that I have missed so much these last 16 years. This book has helped me so much in reframing my mindset and defining our sex life and marriage into something totally more amazing than I dreamed possible. I am going to admit, it is going to take me a lot more work in regards to healing from my past, but, I know that it will be worth it. Not just for me, but also for us. How having more sex can improve your health, mood and even your career Problem: We have sex less often

A lot of women are very responsive to a man’s voice during lovemaking,” Davidson says. “If a man has verbal facility and can entice a woman through his voice, that can become a powerful part of his repertoire. Age-related hormonal drops for both sexes can make bodies less responsive and result in weaker pelvic floor muscles, meaning it takes longer to achieve orgasm. Esposito, K. et al. “Mediterranean Diet Improves Sexual Function in Women with Metabolic Syndrome,” International Journal of Impotence Research (2007) 19:486. Aged 14, agonising over forgetting tampons, or living in fear of stains, was fair enough – but at 25, 28, 33...? I assumed I was failing at menstrual management while everyone else aced it. While the pace may slow down a little with age, the good news is that sex can actually be more rewarding as you get older. In the same Saga survey, the older respondents said they found making love was “more fulfilling” now than in their youth.In recent years, we’ve seen a huge rise in ‘silver singles’ – divorcees in their fifties and above who find themselves out there on the single scene for the first time in decades. Alex’s advice? ‘Go forth and read, then find a supportive partner (or group) for practical discovery sessions.’ And we need to destigmatise masturbation: ‘It’s one of the most satisfying ways to learn about yourself.’ Wow, wow, wow! Both my husband and I couldn’t put this book down! I would highly recommend this book for anyone (men, women, couples) who desire to love their spouse well and seek after God’s heart for their marriage; especially if you or your spouse grew up in the evangelical church or purity culture and have been hurt by some of those teaching. Whether you are engaged and you want your marriage and s-x life to start out well, or you are in a great marriage and want to continue growing in intimacy and digging out any weeds that might poke their heads up, or you are in a difficult marriage and want to find healing and a healthy path forward, or you are divorced and need the healing light of Jesus to touch your broken and hurting heart, or you are in a Christian leadership or ministry position and want to know how to better support those under your care. This book is for you; each one of you. I have spent years trying to find balance in the teachings about sex. I was scared to look at secular books because I do not ascribe to that world view. And now, finally, a voice of reason on this topic. A voice that says that women should receive pleasure from sex. Women are not the vessels that men have to fulfill carnal needs. That men can control themselves. That women aren't responsible for a man choosing to use pornography. That a wife isn't at fault for her husband choosing to cheat on her. That sex is good, and right and should be pleasurable to both parties involved. That incredible sex for women can and should happen. That a good sex life is crucial to a good marriage, but that you can't have that without true intimacy and respect flowing both ways. That yes, we can heal from the horrible teachings we've had thus far and change the future for our children.

And Cosmopolitan, in partnership with Men’s Health, has partnered with UK schools to improve sex ed offerings. Great sex is in the eye of the beholder, or the be-hander,” says Patti Britton, a clinical sexologist and author of The Art of Sex Coaching. “For some men, it might be the ability to produce fantabulous multiple orgasms in their partner. For other men, it might mean being able to last three minutes. Being a great lover means becoming a great lover to your particular partner, and that requires doing something very difficult: opening your mouth.” I devoured this book in 4 days and I’m left reeling. I have no idea how to sum it all up! I plan to buy at least 10 more for giving away. This book is revolutionary. Sheila NAILS it, repeatedly, all over the place. I cannot recommend it highly enough for undoing all the crappy things we were taught about sex!

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Right. The mouth. Useful for kissing and other orally administered forms of arousal (none of which should be underestimated), it’s also a tool for communication. Try it. Tell them what you want. Ask them what they like. Shoot for trust and openness. People in good health with a decent level of fitness are nearly twice as likely to be interested in sex as they grow older, and also more likely to report having a satisfying sex life, according to a study by the University of Chicago. The research found men in ‘very good’ health could expect to add seven years to their ‘sex life expectancy’, while women in the same position could add up to six. When Kris first recommended this one to me, I assumed this would be another Josh-Harris-purity-culture-harangue. I was pleasantly surprised when I Kissed Dating Goodbye didn't get mentioned at all. (Or at least, if there was a throw-away mention, it didn't register for me.) This book is much more focused on dealing with books towards married couples and debunking many of the myths told to men and women about sex, intimacy, lust, and marriage. It was a nice switch. The path to satisfying sex as you age is not always smooth. Understanding the problems can be an effective first step to finding solutions. Martin, C.K. et al. “Effect of Calorie Restriction on Mood, Quality of Life, Sleep, and Sexual Function in Healthy Non-obese Adults: The CALERIE 2 Randomized Clinical Trial,” JAMA Internal Medicine (2016) 176:743.